September 05, 2007

stressed

I am totally stressed out.  I’ve never felt this way two days into the school year.  I just don’t get it. I’ve been teaching for four years now and this is my third year in fourth grade.  I have crap all over my classroom. My books are a complete mess and I can’t even see the bottom of my desk or have any idea the crap that is on my desk.  I don’t have their names written anywhere.  I don’t have my charts up in my classroom yet.  I haven’t picked a line leader, I haven’t given out class jobs, I didn’t assign line spots or carpet spots.  My computers aren’t hooked up yet.  I lost my grading book that I just bought.  I collected notices and I didn’t write down the kids I still need to get stuff from.  They keep bringing in supplies for the classroom use and I ran out of room so they are scattered all over the classroom, thrown where ever.  This is crazy, I am not usually like this.  I am blaming it on the new schedule this year.  I am losing 20 minutes in the morning.  It’s amazing the things I got done in those 20 minutes.  I feel like I’m busier this year than any other year, but why am I so far behind? 

I think I’m trying to do too much during the day.  As it was today, I didn’t have time to do my science lesson or finish my math lesson.  I think part of it is because of the pace that my class is working though.  Not to mention half my class didn’t do my math homework last night correctly.  It was like I had to reteach the lesson and give the same homework over again.  This is going to be a long year.  I need for this week to just end.  I can’t take it anymore. 

It’s not all bad, really it’s not.  I just need to get organized.  I need to really go in early and stay late and bring more stuff home to do.  It will all work out.  (I hope)

The highlight of my day today was that one of my students who seems to be unhappy ALL of the time, actually seemed to smile a little today.  He even raised his hand and participated.  Day two and no one has cried!